June 13, 1993
I have had you or my mind and heart for sometime but just haven't written as I wasn't sure what I wanted to say. I hadn't forgotten you and I want you to know that we love and care for you deeply. You are part of our family and that is very very important to me.
As you know I do not approve or agree with homosexuality. I love the thought that automatically that makes me intolerant, a bigot or homophoebic. It is not the gay person I disapprove of but the act or deed that I believe is so wrong. I wish the gays would understand that we do not hate the person but we do have the right to discriminate and be intolerant of the act or deed which we believe is morally wrong.
I do not understand why we are being forced into saying to be gay is okay with us. It is against our moral beliefs. What a person does in the privacy of their home, I have no control over but for the gays to say we have to teach it to our children (my grandbabies) as normal acts and behaviors then they have stepped into my yard and I will do everything I possibly can to stop it. So why won't the gay people accept us for our beliefs and what we want our families to learn. Why are they forcing it on us. We do not believe gays are born that we. Even sexual orientation tho implied to mean born means circumstances, environment. I do not know what happens to a person and I certainly don't claim to know. I wish I knew the answer. I wish also I knew why people use drugs and alcohol when they know the consequences. I would think now with AIDS and HIV so predominate that everything would be done to curb the actions of spreading it - both gay and straight. I guess what I am saying is that choices lead to consequences. If a person chooses to be gay then that person has to answer to God - not me. Same as I have to answer to God and on those grounds alone I cannot accept homosexual acts as okay.
When we lived in Texas and you talked to me about the kids calling you queer. I asked how you felt and you said mad at them. I am sorry now that I didn't take the time to talk to you and have you explain just what you meant. If I had taken the time and really listened maybe you wouldn't have been so vunerable. I don't know what all happened in your life and I certainly do not place the blame on anyone, I just think at a time in your life when you needed to be loved and accepted for yourself the wrong person came along. I believe as a young boy you were confused about sexual urges and feelings. Some of the things you did were normal sexual exploration as all kids do. You just had no one to talk to about these things and automatically you thought you had done something wrong. I know part of your life and circumstances so I am aware that you really didn't have a normal childhood and upbringing. I think sometimes people fail to respond to the needs of the children - and I certainly do not exclude myself from that statement.
Now I come to the most important part oft my letter. I know Charlotte has talked to you about your lifestyle and soul. It is never to late to ask the Lord for forgiveness and accept him as your savior. I know your desires will still be strong but learning to say no and denying yourself of those urges for Jesus you will receive strength and courage. I urge you to go see Charlotte and your dad and ask them for their help. Find a Christian couselor and a Bible based preacher and go to him. You do not have to be embarrassed by anything you have ever done. If so everyone would be embarrassed. All of us have done things in our life that we would like to change, but with the help of Jesus we have been able to ask for forgiveness, receive forgiveness and trust in Him to help us. You need strong Christian support to change your life. I can only beg you to consider. I know Jesus loves you and me, as he loves all sinners, it is the sins he speaks against and all of us struggle with sin.
The spiral of sin is Desire, Decision, Depart, Deception, Defeat, Despair, Desperation, and finally Deliverance. Sin ruins us morally, financially, physically, we loose our self respect, self esteem, family and friends.
Wes, I would ask you to read Luke 15. I heard a preacher speaking on this today. I thought about you and wished so hard that you would be listening to it. I don't know what Channel he would be (CBS) on in your area but here it is Sunday at 7:00 a.m. His name is Charles Stanley and he originates out of Atlanta GA. His message was so plain and simple. If you can try to listen to him. Also if there should happen to be a Faith Evangelical Free Church in your area I would invite you to attend. The name may scare you but it is not an extreme church - not charismatic but good old fashioned Christianity. They teach love and forgiveness.
I also would ask you to invite Tom and anyother friends that you have who would seek to change their lives. By the Grace of God we are forgiven. We just ask, accept, believe and be thankful that Jesus is so compassionate. God loves us. Read John 3:16.
You are kept in the kid's thoughts and prayers. I am still learning how to be good about praying. I sometimes depend on myself and forget to ask the Lord for guidance. When I remember to pray at night and in the morning my day is much better. I even do quick little prayers throughout the day.
If I can help you, let me know. I think Wes and Charlotte would be so happy to have you back, they would accept you and forgive you. Just ask.
We love you,